Song Lyrics of the Day

"El Scorcho" - Weezer

I'm a lot like you so please
Hello, I'm here, I'm waiting
I think I'd be good for you
And you'd be good for me

Monday Morning Emails...

Sometimes there are the emails that remind you why you come to work every day...

"Damn girl. You're undeniably good. Thank you."

Makes Monday morning not hurt so badly...

Song Lyrics of the Day

"I Hear the Bells" - Mike Doughty

I'm seeking girls
In sales and marketing
Let's go make out
Up in the balcony
Your business dress
So businesslike and I'm
Tossing the blouse
Over a chairback and

I can
Hear the bells are
Ringing joyful and triumphant and I can
Hear the bells are
Ringing joyful and triumphant

Worth writing home about...

While Molly and I had a fantastic day at the Fair yesterday (which deserves a post of its own, to come), tonight I had a meal I will be dreaming of for nights to come until I can finally have it again (and that, folks, might be quite a while).

Tonight Tristan and I went to what I will undoubtedly call my favorite restaurant in the Twin Cities: Muffuletta. A small little place in a little St Paul neighborhood. Cute, quaint, quiet, a perfect date spot, great service, and above all, locally produced amazing food. Not to mention Abi, a great friend, works there! A must dine. Sit in Abi's section, she's amazing.

Anyway... tonight Tristan and I went, as I only have two weeks left in the Cities and we had to get there once more before I left. And tonight I had a dish that undoubtedly will become one of my favorite dishes of all time: roasted eggplant, mushrooms, caramelized onions, and toasty brown gnocchi, sauteed with butter, parmesan, and lemon, drizzled with lemon olive oil. It was so amazing. I will honestly be anxiously awaiting the next time I am back in the Cities and can get my fix. It was that good. That's not to say the beer cheese soup with fresh popcorn, garlic "paste" and bread, and wine weren't amazing... it's just that this gnocchi was melt-in-your-mouth-good.

To Abi and the folks at Muffuletta -- thank you for what is not only my favorite restaurant in the Twin Cities, but the best dish I've had outside my mom's kitchen.

To all you Muffuletta virgins -- go. If you miss out on this place it will be detrimental to your Twin Cities experience.


Now, it's off to bed in preparation for Rabbi-ing Annie's Bat Mitzvah tomorrow. Shabbat Shalom -- and don't forget... Muffuletta.

Second time, still no charm...

I don't often find a restaurant where I am disappointed, I really don't.

A couple years ago, maybe two or three, Harry and I tried out a new place that went into what was Betty's Bikes and Buns, on the corner around the block from my Northeast apartment.

Brasa, a new southern-style rotisserie joint, had just moved in and we thought we'd best try it out. Who doesn't love the idea of rotisserie meats and southern side dishes. I forget what Harry had... I know it included the cheesy grits and fried plantains. I had chicken and a side or two. Harry loved it.. I wasn't overly impressed and was in no rush to go back.

Tonight, some friends and I went to the newer St Paul location to celebrate a birthday. Again, not overly excited to go back, I went anyway, of course, to see everyone and celebrate. I opted for the black beans and yellow rice, with a corn muffin and honey butter. I wans't going to spend the extra money on the unimpressive chicken I had before. And again this time, I was not overly impressed. It's rare I slam a restaurant, but there was nothing special about anything at the table. I could have easily made these dishes... and better. Though the sweet tea was amazing, no reason to go back.

So that's the scoop. Try it if you want... and let me know what you think... but twice was more than enough for me.

Give me a minute...

I think one of my biggest office pet peeves is when I walk into the office in the morning, sit down at my desk, and barely open my Outlook to let all the overnight emails come piling in, when my lovely coworker starts pinging off question after question about things she has already seen in her inbox. Give me 20 minutes to at least let all the new messages load before you start asking me questions and telling me you will follow up. I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about or how to respond without having seen the emails already. Chill the eff out -- I just got here!

(That was already this morning after the coffee I got smelled like rotten garbage and the pharmacy told me I didn't have enough info on my new health insurance plan to get my prescription without paying the full price. ... and it's only 7:20a...)

Happy Thursday, everyone.

Thanks.

All I needed was a little support. Something to tell me what I am about to do is ok and that you are excited for me and proud of me and happy I am finally getting to be where, or at least really close, to where I've always wanted to be. But instead I got nothing. In the two and a half hours we spent together tonight, I got maybe five words out of you and you wouldn't even look at me. I knew it was going to be hard to tell you, but I didn't think it would be this hard. I thought you would maybe at least pretend to be happy for me and excited for me or something.. but instead I got the cold shoulder. I don't know what else to say or do to make it better... and frankly, I am kind of tired of trying. The last year has been all about you -- never once I have ever asked for anything in return. It was all about you. Tonight, I needed it to be about me. I needed you there for me... to support me. And I got nothing. For once.. I am thinking about me. I thought you would understand that. It's just not fair...

So thanks for the support when I really needed it most... thanks.

All eight inches...

Tonight Allen and I went out to get some dessert... we headed to Old Chicago (after Allen helped me schlep two bookshelves out of IKEA and into my car) for an appetizer and the warm chocolate chip cookie in a pizza pan topped with ice cream. There were two on the menu, so we inquired about the difference. The rest of the evening went something like this:

Lizzo to waiter: "Tell us the size difference"
Waiter to Lizzo and Allen: "The small one is five inches, the other is eight."

Lizzo and Allen look at each other, reading each other's minds. The waiter leaves to get our drinks.

Lizzo to Allen: "Eight inches is always better, Allen. Eight inches is always better."

Allen didn't really know to react other than that he already knew I would make some sort of comment to that effect. We made a couple more "eight inch" jokes and enjoyed our appetizer.

Later...

Waiter to Lizzo and Allen: "So you want the big one?"
Lizzo and Allen look at each other, then to the waiter: "Yes!"

Lizzo and Allen devour the cookie. The waiter returns to find out how we're enjoying all eight inches. It was now or never...

Allen looks at Lizzo.

Lizzo to waiter: "Is it inappropriate for me to tell you all eight inches were delicious?!"

Waiter to Lizzo, laughing: "No -- perfect! That was a good one!"
Lizzo to waiter: "Good -- I've been waiting to use that one all night!"


Needless to say, our waiter got a good tip tonight (monetary, folks, monetary).

Typo of the day.

"I appreciate you all working so hard to get the prostitution ready for me."

Oops!

Five restaurant reviews and a near-death experience...

It's been a long week of dining out, folks. Not that I have all the money in the world to spend on dining out or that I hate cooking so much (both very untrue), but in the last week I've had dinner plans quite often.

Last Thursday my Eat It! dinner group went to Santorini. While I could have done without the spanikopita, the trio of dips was amazing. We had the Spicy Feta – Creamy feta with olive oil and hot peppers; Tirosalata – Fresh herbs, peppers and feta cheese; and my personal favorite, Melitzano – Salata – Roasted eggplant with garlic and oil. Not to mention the amount of wine I had. Woah.

Saturday night David and I went to Redstone, where we had the amazing smoked gouda fondue and two desserts. It was awesome. Enough said.

Tuesday night I met up with an old coworker from the U. We went to Amazing Thailand in Uptown. This place was awesome. First, let me tell you about the Tuesday Happy Hour from 4-11p. Definitely worth it. For dinner I had the Pineapple Fried Rice. Delishous. It does indeed come in the pineapple and is enough for at least four meals. And... when the little man wrapped my leftovers, he actually wrapped the entire pineapple half.

Wednesday night my dinner plans were canceled, but my day at the office was miserable so I went to Happy Hour with Amy, then to Tristan's for a drink, and then to Burger Jones for some greasy apps and a beer. While Tristan was really excited about going back here for the cheese curds, and from what I understand the burger Tristan and Jas shared was pretty good, I was not impressed. The fries were soggy and nowhere as amazing as the garlic parm fries David and I had in SanFran, the cheese curds were just... different... and the onion rings were THICK. Not that the apps were bad, I was just hoping for more. Saving grace: Rice Krispie Treat Milkshake, and of couse, the Bells Two Hearted Ale.

Tonight Allen and I went to Prima, where I had my favorite sandwich and salad, which does not need explination.

So my dining out has come to an end.. it's time to get back in the kitchen... or out at the grill! I'm a little appauled with the amount of food out I've eaten in the last week, but it was well worth it to see all my friends... and who doesn't like to dine out!


Now --- the near-death experience. (Ok, so it wasn't a near-death experience, but it was super funny and I could have been injured pretty badly!) Last night when Jas picked Tristan and myself up at Tristan's apartment, she was on the phone. Tristan got in the front and I opened the back passenger door to hop in the back. The seat was full, so I had to move some stuff to the other side. Well... Tristan closed her door, and Jas thought she heard two doors close, so started to drive off.... with me hanging out the car. Tristan and I screamed "JAS" and she said, "Woah. John, I have to go... I just about ran over Liz." That's right, my friends, Jas started to drive off with me only half in the car! Good thing the door was open and she was going forwards, not backwards. Had she been in reverse, I would have been a pancake on the ground.

Nice work, Jas. Next time, get off the phone and check to see all passengers are in the car before driving off!

Stop the noise!

There is a time and a place for outdoor repairs. I understand the need and sometime urgency to get an outdoor project finished, I really do. What I do not understand is why these workers seem to think it's acceptable to be outside schlepping and sawing and banging and hammering after 5:00p. For the second night in a row now, these folks have been outside my window in the little wooded area between my building and the golf course, building something or another. Looks a little like a retaining wall or something, but nonetheless, they are building. Now, I know they want to get it done, but they should be doing this work - the schlepping and sawing and banging and hammering -- during the day, while most of us tenants are at work. When the 5:00p bell rings, that should be it. Yes -- it stays light out pretty late in the spring/summer hours here in the Midwest, but COME ON! After a long day at work, no one wants to come home to schlepping and sawing and banging and hammering until 9:00 at night!

Pack up and go home, bitches!

Close the door...

At home, if I'm the only person in my apartment, I often will leave the bathroom door open when I visit the lavatory. However, if I am out in public, read: my office, I most definitely close and lock the stall door -- whether I am the only person in the entire building or not.

This afternoon, as I went into the office bathroom to brush my teeth, I could hear there was someone else in there. However, all three stall doors we ajar. The person in the stall realized I had entered the bathroom, made some noise, and closed and locked her stall. Then, once done with her business, while I was brushing my teeth, she opened the stall door. Normal procedure if finished... except she had not completely zipped and buttoned her pants!

Come on, lady! This is a public restroom!

Two more days...

The damn Apple Store doesn't even have the part they need to fix my computer in yet. They say maybe it came in today and it hasn't been logged yet. This means at least two more days before I get my computer back.

I might die...

I must be a curse...

It seems that since I started working for whatever organization you want to call the last almost four years of my career, I have a curse. It's unintentional, but those who sign up to work with me in the future should be forewarned:

It seems every product manager assigned to categories paired with my marketing expertise either get fired, laid off, or quit.

In the four years I've been working on this brand, I've been through more product managers than imaginable. Not counting all my appliance friends, with whom I no longer work, in the consumer electronics realm alone, I've officially, as of about an hour ago, been through seven product managers. Unreal.

So to all your product managers out there, think twice before signing on to work with me... apparently I must be a curse.

4 Days and $200 later

I took my baby to the doctor today. Yes, the mac when in to the Apple Store. The little Apple guy, no taller than myself, told me if I was careful with my precious computer, I could just tape the side together and be on my merry way. OR... I could leave it, spend a small fortune, and get the entire bottom replaced. Though I can't bear to leave my baby with the doctor, not to mention over the weekend, I will fork out the cash and have 'er fixed. There's no way I want to deal with a flaw in the chassis. Repair it, bitches! So, on Monday or Tuesday I will pick up my baby from the hospital with a completely new body.

Now... if I can only make it through the weekend...

Great Success...

I think Rabbi Allen's email to myself and Dave (the co-chair) expresses last night's Fundraiser best.

"Words alone cannot capture all of my feelings regarding last night's fundraiser. It was a tremendous evening and a wonderful event. You and your committee did an excellent job of motivating and mobilizing; encouraging and energizing; celebrating and "sellabrating". I am sure I speak for every rabbi when I say how touched I was with the dignity of the tributes and the truth behind each presentation. I know it was a difficult time to be promoting and working on a fundraiser--but we did great---beyond any dollars raised we had an evening which showed the shul at its best. Thank-you and please organize a gathering at a local establishment--and this first round is on me. Try and get some of your life back these next few weeks. BTW, the tribute book turned out to be a great piece of work. Thank-you and Yasjer kochechem--and please pass on my sincere appreciation to the entire committee. Rabbi Allen"

While it was SO much work, it was a great event (notwithstanding the handful of glitches throughout the night) and I am happy with the outcome.... and really happy it's over.

This better be from stress...

This morning I woke up with a huge hive on my right cheek, the hiccups, and a pounding headache. Last night I only drank 1/2 a beer. The fundraiser is tomorrow... this better be from stress...

Mmmm, sandwiches.

As of late, I have become quite fond of a sandwich at my favorite neighborhood lunch spot: Prima. I always get the same thing; I can’t help it. For those of you who don’t know (which means you don’t know me at all!), I love sandwiches. So when I encountered this sandwich for the first time, I was in heaven. Now, after I have made one deduction of ingredients, I have come up with what I order every single time: the Tuscan Chicken Salad Panini, without the chicken salad.

This sandwich is SO good. Avocado, roasted tomato, fresh mozzarella, basil, and a balsamic reduction on whatever bread they use that day, most often a focaccia roll of sorts. There is something about it I just can’t get enough of. That, with the caesar salad and a diet coke and I’m happy for the rest of the day.

Yum.

"Scenario"

I have officially added the word "scenario" to the list of words I hate. I have a coworker that uses it way too often, and frankly, I can't take it anymore. Everything has a scenario. Not a situation or circumstance or special case... everything is a damn "scenario". Every time she says it, I cringe, and I'm pretty sure if she keeps it up, I'll break.

Congratulations, "scenario", you've made the list.

Jewish NYC doll Rebecca joins American Girl lineup

NEW YORK - The American Girl doll company is adding a new character to its multiethnic lineup. She's Rebecca, a Jewish Russian immigrant girl living on Manhattan's Lower East Side in 1914.

Jewish leaders who've seen the Rebecca doll and read the accompanying books say they're generally impressed.

Rebecca goes on sale May 31. She'll join the Middleton, Wis.-based company's other dolls such as Addy the escaped slave and Kaya the native American.

American Girl dolls cost about $95 each. American Girl LLC was bought in 1998 by El Segundo, Calif.-based Mattel Inc., the nation's largest maker of toys including Barbie dolls.

As seen in the Star Tribune.

A crack...

There is so much more going on in my life right now probably, ok certainly, more important than what I am about to report, but this cannot be overlooked:

There is a crack in my mac chassis. Not sure how it happened, how long it's been there (couldn't be long, I would have noticed it before!), or what I did to deserve this, but my poor little mac has to go to the mac doctor and I am not happy about it.

What I will say is when this news was shared with those I was conversing with at the time, I got an immediate phone call to make sure I was ok. At least he knew how much of a crisis this really is.

Which made me remember one of my favorite television quotes of all time:

Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate. Without them, what would shape our lives? Perhaps if we never veered off course we wouldn't fall in love, or have babies, or be who we are. After all, seasons change. So do cities. People come into your life and people go. But it's comforting to know the ones you love are always in your heart. And if you're very lucky, a plane ride away.

Thanks for thinking of me and calling to comfort me in my time of need (yes, my cracked computer chassis is a BIG DEAL). I miss you and love you and your lovely lady for knowing just what I needed to make this ok.

And yes... I am lucky... you're only a plane ride away.

Lamy's Quote of the Day

"Look at the tag line. It's not even below the logo. It's wrapped around. That's called... wrapping."

TomG says...

"This body is a temple. A synagogue, if you will. A pork-friendly synagogue."

The end is near...

Official termination date for all employees: Friday, May 15.

Smells like...

I don't know what it is, certainly not me, but every morning around 8:45-9:00 it smells like poop in my cubicle/office area. I have yet to figure it out, but it's really gross. There aren't many people here, so it's not like someone ripped ass or anything, but it happens almost every day and it's starting to get really nasty.

I wonder if TomG hid something in the cube area. Hmm.

I guess the good news (?) is we'll all be out of this office by the end of May anyway....

Live!

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls...

I am proud to announce the launch of my website!

If all goes will, this will help me land a new job... soon, I hope!

Did you know...

Only 10% of the world's olives become table olives. The rest become olive oil.

A Good Omen?

This morning I put on a shirt my sister pawned off on my last week when I was home. As I got ready to put it over my curly head, I noticed some printed text on the bottom back corner.

"Every day a new opportunity"

Maybe it's a good omen....

Three Things:

1. Today Facebook suggested I add Sarah Palin as a friend. Clearly those creepy fingers behind Facebook and suggesting friends don't know me very well.
2. I have rediscovered my love for red seedless grapes. Maybe it's because we're almost through Pesach, I have all these dietary regulations to adhere to, and I am really anxious to be done with it, but red seedless grapes are truly succulent and delicious. I have eaten almost the entire bag I bought last night... I just hope it doesn't turn into the same situation my grandma was in after eating all those grape tomatoes. Yikes!
   
3. I am amidst creating my website portfolio and pretty much love it. Good thing there's no work to be done in my office (due to the pending count decision tomorrow) so I'll have lots more time to work on it tomorrow.
   

At a KinkyJews Seder, Pharoah Isn’t the Only One With the Whip

Forget the bitter herbs.

When about 100 Jews gather in Brooklyn on April 5 for a pre-Passover Seder, they will pay homage to their enslaved ancestors not with the traditional sinus-clearing horseradish, but by spanking each other with wands of chocolate licorice.

They will recount the story of Passover with a liberal dose of double entendre; they will break from the Haggadah reading to play a grown-up version of show-and-tell, in which guests showcase their “most-treasured kinky item” — be it a restraint, a whip or a pair of spiked heels; and they will sing a sex-positive version of “Dayenu,” with lyrics like, “If she only dressed in leather/Bright and shiny patent leather/If she only dressed in leather/Dayenu.”

The unconventional Passover meal, which will be held this year at the Brooklyn swingers spot Club Casbar, has become an annual ritual for the members of KinkyJews. The New York-based social organization caters to Jews drawn to outside-the-mainstream sexual behaviors, such as power-exchange relationships, sadomasochism and partner swapping. For the group’s members, the Passover story of Jews in bondage, and their hard-won freedom and escape, has special meaning.

“We don’t draw a direct comparison between our ‘bondage’ and the bondage of true slavery,” said Naomi, the yeshiva graduate who founded KinkyJews, and who asked that her last name not be published. “However, we do have an additional perspective when we relate to the concepts of bondage, slavery and redemption of the Passover story, since these are common themes in our relationships and sexual expression.”

Naomi, a 30-year-old nonprofit programming professional who has held jobs at a Manhattan synagogue and at a group that serves Jewish students, started KinkyJews on the social-networking site Friendster in 2005 “to create a safe and inclusive community for people who identify strongly with both Judaism and kink.” Ever since, the New York-based group has grown steadily, with the number of people who have registered as members on the group’s Web site surpassing 2,000, according to Naomi.

Another member of the organization, Dave, a 40-year-old who works in finance and also asked to be identified only by his first name, said that at its core, KinkyJews is about engaging those who might not otherwise participate in Jewish communal life. He said that when, as a young adult, he was first drawn to power-exchange relationships — sexual experiences that involve domination and submission — he worried that there was something wrong with him. “Initially, I had no idea that there was anyone else like me, let alone Jewish women who were actually into these kinds of things,” he said.

KinkyJews hosts about two events a month, ranging from holiday parties to happy hours, from film screenings to Lower East Side walking tours — complete with talks about the role of Jews in smut peddling and a stop at the sex toy store Babeland.

The sold-out Passover Seder, now in its fourth year, is the group’s largest annual event. Tickets are $60 for couples, $50 for single men, and $15 for single women. “It’s always easier to attract single men than single women,” Naomi explained. “Men are much more likely to come to events with sexual themes.”

Not every Jewish man who is interested in sexual themes, however, is equally excited by the Kinky Seder.

Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, the author of “The Kosher Sutra: Eight Sacred Secrets for Reigniting Desire and Restoring Passion for Life” (HarperOne), said the notion of a kink-themed Seder is disrespectful to both the sanctity of marital relations and to the Passover holiday.

“Can you imagine the outrage if a group of people decided to commemorate African-American slavery by having an orgy?” Boteach asked. “This wasn’t a joke. Millions of God’s children were sold on the block, and here you are trivializing evil with this vulgar celebration.”

More broadly, he said that while it’s perfectly acceptable for a couple to indulge in a sexual fetish within the confines of a love-filled marriage, he disapproves of “kinky” group events such as the Kinky Seder

“To do this in the name of Judaism is especially unfortunate, when you take into account the very sexual nature of Passover,” he said, noting that, according to Passover midrash, Israelite women enslaved in Egypt would seduce their husbands, in defiance of Pharaoh’s decree against their procreation. “That was to ensure the future of the Jewish people. It wasn’t trivial.”

Unsurprisingly, KinkyJews has its share of critics who find the organization to be a bit of a shande. “I get hate mail,” Naomi said. “One person compared us to Jews for Jesus…. But we have no intention of besmirching Jewish tradition; we’re just celebrating ourselves in a fun way.”

Kinky Seder guests, who are encouraged to dress in “fetish attire” — no jeans, no sneakers, please — are likely to be disappointed if they’re expecting an orgy to break out at the Seder. While KinkyJews-sponsored events occasionally involve on-site sexual experimentation, the vast majority do not, members say.

“I grew up going to Seders that were so serious,” said a 24-year-old freelance sex writer whose pen name is Ginger Millay, and who will be attending the Kinky Seder for the first time this year. “It will be nice to go to one that’s based in the tradition, but is also fun and silly and hedonistic. If it devolves into something else, great; and if not, that’s okay, too.”

As printed in The Jewish Daily Forward

April Fools?

This must be a bad joke on the part of Mother Nature --- it's snowing. And no, I'm not kidding. Snowing. Like a real snow storm.... on April 1. Come on!

So much...

Do you ever get to that point where you have so much going on you can't stop and think straight for even one minute second? So much to do for everything going on, whether it be work or school or friends or life in general? I think I've hit the breaking point. There's this and that and the other thing, all that need my immediate attention. Balance is out of the question. How I will pull it all off or make it through all this shit is yet to be determined... though we all know I'll go to wit's end to get it all done. But I'm starting to wonder... a) will it ever end? and b) will it end before I break?

I love him...

I know a lot of you don't understand and don't think it's right, but I love him. I really love him.

To My Friends...

I love each and every one of you.

A Perfect Combination...

There is nothing better than Tom Colicchio and Diet Coke in the same commercial:



YUM!

Weather Wisdom..

This morning I decided to check the weather before I hopped into the shower to get ready for shul. Weather.com is very wise:

"Snow during the morning will transition to snow showers during the afternoon."

Why not just say "It's going to snow all day, bitches. You live in Minnesota. Deal with it." No need to soften to blow.

And last time I checked, morning always transitions to afternoon...

A good sauce with an asian flare

Here's a good sauce to make...

1/4 cup water
1 tablespoon fish sauce
1 tablespoon soy sauce
2 teaspoons sugar
1 teaspoon red pepper flakes


Tonight I cut one bunch of asparagus into about inch-sized pieces, tossed it with a little olive oil and some season salt, then roasted in a tin foil packed for about 3o minutes. Then I sauteed two chicken breasts, cut into small chunks, then added the asparagus, and the above sauce. Let that cook up a couple minutes to let the sauce marry in and there you have it.

Yum.

Quote of the Day

"Don't make me whip out my Maid of Honor powers on your Bride-ass!"

-- Me in an email to Molly.

Mom's Carrot Cake

There's something about my mom's carrot cake. My Aunt Ione has known it all along -- she always would ask my mom to bring the carrot cake when we'd go down to Milwaukee for Chanukkah or any of my cousins' birthdays... but I guess I never really understood why she loved it so much. I mean, yeah, it's good, but my aunt would honestly sit and eat the entire cake had she no will power.

Tonight, however, I think it finally clicked. See, when I finally got home today (after being in Vegas for the majority of the week with my family for my grandma's 80th birthday and then attempting to return to Minneapolis in a snowstorm - yes, the plane landed on the snowy runway; no, I'm not sure how), I knew I had a bag of carrots in my refrigerator that either needed to be used or tossed. And, with the economy as it is, I decided to forgo wasting and find something to make. Carrot cake cupcakes. I called mom, who sent her recipe for the cake. Turns out the only ingredient I needed was a block of creamcheese for the frosting.

Instead of making the triple layered or 9x13 cake, I opted for cupcakes, as I like them better, and frankly, they offer more portion control. With the addition of one cup raisins, which my mom does not add, I made the cupcakes, creamcheese frosting and all. YUM.

This is one recipe I'll keep between me and mom -- you'll all just have to come over and have a cupcake!

The Perfect Mug

So, I'm pretty sure this would be the ultimate mug for my desk. Not only could I fill it with the glory that is jitter juice (read: coffee) or water, but I could also put my schedule right on the side so I don't miss any meetings or calls or lunches or workouts or anything!

Need it!

If I were an M&M...

Note: I did not go blonde. I cannot get the hair a darker brown and my hair is not black.

Company Jet

Someday I am going to own my own company... and have a company jet like this one!

Desk Chairs....

Dear Bueller,

Next time I let you use my computer, do not touch my desk chair. It takes a long time for someone to get their desk chair to the perfect settings... thanks for fucking mine up.

Your friend,
-LIZ-

Cry.

Sometimes you need a good cry. Last night I climbed into bed and cried. Maybe it was because I'm lonely or because I miss my friends. Maybe it was the series finale of Friends I just watched or Adagio playing on my bedside iPod. Maybe it's for some reason I haven't figured out yet or because I'm getting sick. Maybe I am just a stupid girl, but I cried. Sometimes you just need a good cry.

Best. Invention. Ever.

No comment needed.

Sometimes you just have to say it.

I'm not very good at having hard conversations, especially when emotions are involved and I might be hurting someone or putting my feelings on the table. Tonight, I had to send a hard email. And it crushed me. See, I have this friend... and we've been through a lot together. About nine months ago, she moved away... and we kind of lost touch. About a month ago, she moved back home, which is closer, but not here. And last weekend, I got an email. An apology for kind of dropping off the face of the earth (which often happens when we don't live in close proximity). It took me until tonight, five days after getting the email, to figure out how to respond. I knew it was going to be hard, but that I had to say what was on my mind, how I feel. So I did. And it sucked. But I did it. And yes, I'm ok. But I did cry... and I blame you... for reminding me I am indeed ok... but it's ok... I needed it.

... and it's only 7:30am

me: I'm going to get some water.. be right back.

Nathan: k

a minute later...

me: ... and as I filled the bottle, I thought, damn, it would be cool if this water fountain spouted beer.

Nathan: haha
me: seriously, that's what went through my head as I filled the water bottle

Nathan: i have a banana on my desk. i wish it would ring and someone on the other end would give me something fun/cool to do

me: aaahahahah YES!

Nathan: hell, i just wish it would ring. who cares what they wanted

Basil, Chili, and Garlic Chicken

Rice noodles may be my new favorite noodle. They are so thin (and slimy, in a good way) and light and delicious. I vaguely recall making them once or twice with Nickolas back in the day, but can't remember the dish we made or the results. But tonight... tonight I made a recipe using rice noodles that cannot go unnoticed. A great combination of flavors with a little heat... and super easy to make!

Basil, Chili, and Garlic Chicken

What you need:

• 2 tablespoons fish sauce
• 2 tablespoons soy sauce
• 4 teaspoons sugar
• 1 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
• 1/2 pound Asian rice noodles (1 8.8oz package)
• 3 tablespoons vegetable oil
• 8 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 large onion, 1/2 diced, 1/2 thinly sliced
• 1 1/2 pounds skinless, boneless chicken breasts, cut into bite-size pieces
• 1 package basil, ribboned (about 1 cup)
  
• 1 tablespoon cornstarch

What you do:

1. In a small bowl, combine 1/2 cup water with fish sauce, soy sauce, sugar, and crushed red pepper flakes. Stir to dissolve sugar and set aside.
2. In a large pot of boiling water, cook the rice noodles as directed on package. Drain and set aside.
3. While the noodles are cooking, heat 2 tablespoons oil in a large skillet. Saute onions (both sliced and diced) and garlic until softened. Transfer to bowl and set aside.
4. Add remaining 1 tablespoon oil to the same skillet and heat. Add chicken and cook until browned.
5. Once chicken is cooked through, add onion/garlic mixture and sauce, tossing to coat. Heat until bubbly.
6. In a small dish, add 1 teaspoon sauce from skillet to cornstarch. Mix well and add to skillet with onion/garlic/chicken mixture. Let cook until sauce thickens.
7. Take off heat and add basil. Stir until basil begins to wilt.
8. Serve over rice noodles.

Things to note:

• The garlic amount listed up there is actually what the recipe called for. Eight cloves of garlic sounded like a lot, so I did not add any extra. Upon consuming, I am happy with that decision.
• The actual recipe called for two teaspoons of red pepper flakes. I am just starting to build my heat tolerance, so I only used one teaspoon -- it was hot, but not too hot and just right for me. If you like it hot, add two teaspoons.
• One package of rice noodles makes a lot of noodles. I suggest serving the two in separate bowls so the sauce doesn't get all over the extra noodles. Suggestions for leftover noodles: spring rolls!
  

Quote of the Day

"21 below as reported on the news this morning is neither fit for man nor beast."

- an email from my Grandma

Just another Minnesota morning...

6:45am, drive in to work:

-17° before windchill
-31° with wind

5 inches of snow yesterday, with another 3 to come tonight.

Awesome.



PS. Those are negative signs, not dash-style bullet points.

The Culprit!

... we walked into the gym, I heard the TV on, and there it was... FoxNews. I scanned the room... just one culprit...

"It's YOU!" I screamed and pointed to the running man on the treadmill.
"It's YOU!" he screamed back.

Pauli. Pauli has been changing the channel from CNN to FoxNews this entire time. Pauli.

The war is on, Pauli, you will not win.

This is just to say...

Thank you for forgetting
your sweatshirt
that was in
my closet

and which
you were probably
hoping
to pack.

I love it
it's my favorite
so comfortable
and so warm.


(My take on William Carlos Williams's "This Is Just To Say")

So easy, so delicious...

This is by far the best corn chowder I've ever had. My mom made it over Christmas weekend was I was home, and I just had to make it myself (and share it with you). It's as easy as dumping all the ingredients into the crock pot, turning it on, and walking away for 4-5 hours. How easy is that!


Crock Pot Corn Chowder

What you need:

• 1 can cream of mushroom soup
• 1 can creamed corn
• 1 12oz. bag frozen corn
• 1 c. frozen hashbrown potatoes
• 1/2 onion, grated or finely chopped
• 2 1/2 c. milk
• 1 c. diced turkey ham
• salt and pepper to taste

What you do:

1. Dump all ingredients into crock pot.
2. Mix to combine.
3. Cook on HIGH 4-5 hours.

Word of the Day

Pussification

As used in a sentence:

It's the pussification of America.

The Perfect Bedside Lamp

It's been a while since I've absolutely needed something geeky.

NEED THIS:This how perfect this would be... you'd never need a bookmark again (well, unless you're taking your reading materials with you elsewhere). It's the ultimate bedside lamp and I need it.

AND... it totally fits in my bedroom decor!