Sometimes you just have to say it.

I'm not very good at having hard conversations, especially when emotions are involved and I might be hurting someone or putting my feelings on the table. Tonight, I had to send a hard email. And it crushed me. See, I have this friend... and we've been through a lot together. About nine months ago, she moved away... and we kind of lost touch. About a month ago, she moved back home, which is closer, but not here. And last weekend, I got an email. An apology for kind of dropping off the face of the earth (which often happens when we don't live in close proximity). It took me until tonight, five days after getting the email, to figure out how to respond. I knew it was going to be hard, but that I had to say what was on my mind, how I feel. So I did. And it sucked. But I did it. And yes, I'm ok. But I did cry... and I blame you... for reminding me I am indeed ok... but it's ok... I needed it.